Monday, June 6, 2016
Twyla's Life in Guyana: Deeper...Period.
Twyla's Life in Guyana: Deeper...Period.: Man. I have exactly two weeks until I return home. I have been super emotional about it! How will I be able to leave this? This is the...
Deeper...Period.
Man. I have exactly two weeks until I return home. I have been super emotional about it!
On one side, I'm extremely homesick. And how do I know this? Because I've begun having those dreams with my Mom and siblings and close friends and Nigel all attending a huge celebration, partying, dancing, and I am with them. If you can recall, these were the same dreams that permeated my first few weeks here in Guyana. Ain't it funny how things come full circle like that?
I've come such a long way. I can't begin to express how much better I am since I've been here. My students are better musicians. I have helped them get from one place to another. I have become a much better teacher. I've learned to enjoy teaching more than I ever have. I can now make my students laugh and truly enjoy what they are doing, no matter what they may have been going through before class, or what they have to deal with when they leave. As one of my mentors Celeste Cruz once told me, "Yes, it's about the music. But more than anything, it's about making a difference." And boy, was she right.
Suriname/Phagwah/Different Religions
My trip to Suriname was breath-taking. Here are the Cross Family. They hosted us for our stay in Suriname. They spoiled us so! God has placed such beautiful people in our path.
Why did we go to Suriname? Our organization sent the three GLMA teachers to Suriname to lead a couple of music workshops that were open to all Lutheran Church members of Paramaribo, Suriname. We did general music and some vocal workshops also. This was incredible. We also ministered during Palm Sunday service at Pastor Kevin Jacobson's church. What a treat!
I was also able to teach this older gentleman some chords on the guitar. He spoke Dutch and very little English, so my friend Rafael translated for us. He was so happy to be holding and playing a guitar for the first time, and he expressed that he had always wanted to learn to play it since he was 12 years old and his neighbor at the time used to play guitar everyday on his porch. He was so grateful to finally be playing. I'll never forget this moment.
Beautiful People
If you are able to, take a trip to the country of Suriname. It is a gorgeous place, with delicious food and beautiful people. My Lord. Everywhere I turned there were beautiful women and handsome men of all shades. Simply beautiful. Folks with curly hair, straight hair, locs, all with beautiful skin and dazzling smiles. That's another thing I like about Suriname. There is much more ethnic diversity there than in Guyana. There are people ranging in complexion from lily white to onyx. And they all speak Dutch, a beautiful language to listen to. Many also speak English. I like the cultural and ethnic diversity of Paramaribo. I can certainly see myself living there if my musical career permitted.
The food of Suriname? Man. I would go back just for that! Here is a Javanese dish below. The spices and seasonings are nothing like I've ever had, but the blending of them on this plate was so harmonious to my tastebuds. I was in heaven several times during my stay in Suriname. And this meal was one of many culprits that brought me there.
Phagwah is a Hindu religious holiday observed in March to celebrate the triumph of good over evil. Hindus traditionally wear white on Phagwah Day, and everyone showers one another with love, affection, and colorful powder, of course. I've never felt so much love from complete strangers before. It is truly a wonderful experience. It was crazy fun.
Being in Guyana and spending time with people that are different than I has helped me to embrace my own beliefs, and still allow myself to celebrate and enjoy other people's cultural beliefs and celebrations. Why not?! If you are grounded in your own spiritual beliefs and walk, will enjoying the traditional and cultural celebrations of another person's spiritual beliefs cause you to stumble and lose your own footing? Probably not. You'll be fine. I've grown so much here in that regard. Developing a strong relationship with God has helped me to love, appreciate and accept people better than ever before.
Back "Home"/You Know When It's Real
So I am now back in Guyana and absolutely loving it. The food is so rich and healthy! You can eat the unhealthy stuff and it's still healthy because it's real. And you know when it's real (wait, what jingle is that from? Wendy's? Because Wendy's sure as hell ain't real. lol). You know when something isn't natural because you can leave it out of the fridge and the ants won't bother it.
If I leave fresh, locally made passionfruit juice on the table in a glass, the ants would have a field day. I'd find them swimming in the juice and everything. No shame. But if I made some Tang or some Kool-Aid, they wouldn't go anywhere near it. It's the same with food. And since most of the food is natural, I can't leave anything outside of the fridge for long!
Seeing family has been an ultimate goal of mine while being down here, and boy has it been one that I've accomplished. I've been meeting so much family. A couple months back, I met my Daddy's sister for the first time. His sister. I walked up to her and she immediately began to tear up. "Hi, Aunty Agnes," I beamed. And her response? "Oh my goodness. Look at my brother's baby!" She then held my face, "All I'm seeing is my brother in your face!" We embraced each other for what seemed like a lifetime. At 71 years old, my Aunty Agnes is one of the coolest aunts that I have! She's funny, down to earth, and so loving. All of my newly acquainted cousins raved about her, and now I know why.
Meeting new family has been one of the dopest parts of this entire opportunity. Although I am the only singer/musician in my immediate family, I am a dime a dozen in my extended family. There are so many singers and instrumental musicians and composers in the family that I have met and worked with! The gift of music truly runs in the family. My first cousin Collette and all 4 of her sons can sing and play ,several instruments! And boy, can they sing. I mean saaang. Cousin Collette can teach me a thing or two about vocals any day of the week! And coincidentally, she has given voice lessons to many of my current students.
Coming "Back Home" from Home
Being able to go home for the Christmas holiday was really nice, and it made me realize that I can submerge myself, because family will be ok. It finally sunk in that my family is coexisting over there as I am existing here. I feel much better and have truly been able to "go and be great." During last semester, I was often worried that my family wasn't okay; that they were in trouble and needed me. I would reach out to my Mom, Thandi or Kamlyn and would feel like I needed to be there to help with something or comfort someone, and sometimes I even felt like I betrayed them by leaving to do what I am doing here. It was going back home for Christmas that made me see that everyone is fine. They are doing just fine without me, handling conflicts, dealing with unexpected events, making ends meet without my help or input. No one was in danger, no one was in the hospital, no one was in serious trouble and needed ME to come and save them. I conceived that the people I love can exist without my physical presence, and that realization made my heart so much lighter by the time I was getting on the plane and coming back to Guyana.
About Daddy
I'm missing him now more than ever before. It's funny (interesting) because my emotions are a mixture of missing him and being content at the same time. I'm content for several reasons. I have never felt as close to him since he passed as I do now, being in his home town. Meeting his family and close friends has been so rewarding and precious; words cannot describe how it gratifies me to hear stories of my father before he was a father! I always knew my Dad was dope: singer, philosopher, chef, teacher, scientist, mathematician, etc. But getting to know another side of him through his closest friends and cousins has been unreal. The bitter part is that I'm not able to reflect on it all with him, at least not yet. I wish I could tell him how dope he was and that I get it now. I understand why he thought the way he did, why he taught us the things that he deemed important, like loving everyone, having empathy and letting things go that don't bring positive energy.
So it's bittersweet because I can't make new memories with him...But it's okay though. It's sweet because I feel him with me. Like really feel him. It's hard to explain. And it's more than memories. The more I experience missing him and spending time here, the more I've realized that we don't truly know how death and life work. There is a powerful connection between the two that we aren't aware of. My father is gone, but he is kind of here too. And I don't mean it in that cheesy way either. His presence and his energy are still here. And I'm not merely implying that he is here through me. It's more than that. But I'll leave that right there. I'll let it marinate a little bit.
As for my return, I am thinking about everything that I would be leaving behind when I go back to the States...and boy, will I be leaving behind a lot. But I will also be carrying with me so much. I have new mothers that always made sure that I was okay while being here, new recipes to cook and share with my family and friends, new friends, and so many stories. Boy! That might be the best part. At least 3 times since January have I laughed until I cried while being here! So I truly thank Guyana for her warmth, her loving people, and her peace. I'll be home in two weeks. Thanks for sharing in my experiences yet again. See you soon. :)
~Twy
How will I be able to leave this? This is the view from my front door.
On one side, I'm extremely homesick. And how do I know this? Because I've begun having those dreams with my Mom and siblings and close friends and Nigel all attending a huge celebration, partying, dancing, and I am with them. If you can recall, these were the same dreams that permeated my first few weeks here in Guyana. Ain't it funny how things come full circle like that?
I've come such a long way. I can't begin to express how much better I am since I've been here. My students are better musicians. I have helped them get from one place to another. I have become a much better teacher. I've learned to enjoy teaching more than I ever have. I can now make my students laugh and truly enjoy what they are doing, no matter what they may have been going through before class, or what they have to deal with when they leave. As one of my mentors Celeste Cruz once told me, "Yes, it's about the music. But more than anything, it's about making a difference." And boy, was she right.
Suriname/Phagwah/Different Religions
My trip to Suriname was breath-taking. Here are the Cross Family. They hosted us for our stay in Suriname. They spoiled us so! God has placed such beautiful people in our path.
One of the adult workshops
Ministering on Palm Sunday
I was also able to teach this older gentleman some chords on the guitar. He spoke Dutch and very little English, so my friend Rafael translated for us. He was so happy to be holding and playing a guitar for the first time, and he expressed that he had always wanted to learn to play it since he was 12 years old and his neighbor at the time used to play guitar everyday on his porch. He was so grateful to finally be playing. I'll never forget this moment.
If you are able to, take a trip to the country of Suriname. It is a gorgeous place, with delicious food and beautiful people. My Lord. Everywhere I turned there were beautiful women and handsome men of all shades. Simply beautiful. Folks with curly hair, straight hair, locs, all with beautiful skin and dazzling smiles. That's another thing I like about Suriname. There is much more ethnic diversity there than in Guyana. There are people ranging in complexion from lily white to onyx. And they all speak Dutch, a beautiful language to listen to. Many also speak English. I like the cultural and ethnic diversity of Paramaribo. I can certainly see myself living there if my musical career permitted.
The food of Suriname? Man. I would go back just for that! Here is a Javanese dish below. The spices and seasonings are nothing like I've ever had, but the blending of them on this plate was so harmonious to my tastebuds. I was in heaven several times during my stay in Suriname. And this meal was one of many culprits that brought me there.
We did lots of sightseeing.
Hindu temple
The Suriname Sea Wall
Sunset over the water. You know I can't forget about my sunsets!
In New Amsterdam, Suriname
We also celebrated Phagwah.
Being in Guyana and spending time with people that are different than I has helped me to embrace my own beliefs, and still allow myself to celebrate and enjoy other people's cultural beliefs and celebrations. Why not?! If you are grounded in your own spiritual beliefs and walk, will enjoying the traditional and cultural celebrations of another person's spiritual beliefs cause you to stumble and lose your own footing? Probably not. You'll be fine. I've grown so much here in that regard. Developing a strong relationship with God has helped me to love, appreciate and accept people better than ever before.
Back "Home"/You Know When It's Real
So I am now back in Guyana and absolutely loving it. The food is so rich and healthy! You can eat the unhealthy stuff and it's still healthy because it's real. And you know when it's real (wait, what jingle is that from? Wendy's? Because Wendy's sure as hell ain't real. lol). You know when something isn't natural because you can leave it out of the fridge and the ants won't bother it.
If I leave fresh, locally made passionfruit juice on the table in a glass, the ants would have a field day. I'd find them swimming in the juice and everything. No shame. But if I made some Tang or some Kool-Aid, they wouldn't go anywhere near it. It's the same with food. And since most of the food is natural, I can't leave anything outside of the fridge for long!
Seeing family has been an ultimate goal of mine while being down here, and boy has it been one that I've accomplished. I've been meeting so much family. A couple months back, I met my Daddy's sister for the first time. His sister. I walked up to her and she immediately began to tear up. "Hi, Aunty Agnes," I beamed. And her response? "Oh my goodness. Look at my brother's baby!" She then held my face, "All I'm seeing is my brother in your face!" We embraced each other for what seemed like a lifetime. At 71 years old, my Aunty Agnes is one of the coolest aunts that I have! She's funny, down to earth, and so loving. All of my newly acquainted cousins raved about her, and now I know why.
Meeting new family has been one of the dopest parts of this entire opportunity. Although I am the only singer/musician in my immediate family, I am a dime a dozen in my extended family. There are so many singers and instrumental musicians and composers in the family that I have met and worked with! The gift of music truly runs in the family. My first cousin Collette and all 4 of her sons can sing and play ,several instruments! And boy, can they sing. I mean saaang. Cousin Collette can teach me a thing or two about vocals any day of the week! And coincidentally, she has given voice lessons to many of my current students.
Coming "Back Home" from Home
Being able to go home for the Christmas holiday was really nice, and it made me realize that I can submerge myself, because family will be ok. It finally sunk in that my family is coexisting over there as I am existing here. I feel much better and have truly been able to "go and be great." During last semester, I was often worried that my family wasn't okay; that they were in trouble and needed me. I would reach out to my Mom, Thandi or Kamlyn and would feel like I needed to be there to help with something or comfort someone, and sometimes I even felt like I betrayed them by leaving to do what I am doing here. It was going back home for Christmas that made me see that everyone is fine. They are doing just fine without me, handling conflicts, dealing with unexpected events, making ends meet without my help or input. No one was in danger, no one was in the hospital, no one was in serious trouble and needed ME to come and save them. I conceived that the people I love can exist without my physical presence, and that realization made my heart so much lighter by the time I was getting on the plane and coming back to Guyana.
About Daddy
I'm missing him now more than ever before. It's funny (interesting) because my emotions are a mixture of missing him and being content at the same time. I'm content for several reasons. I have never felt as close to him since he passed as I do now, being in his home town. Meeting his family and close friends has been so rewarding and precious; words cannot describe how it gratifies me to hear stories of my father before he was a father! I always knew my Dad was dope: singer, philosopher, chef, teacher, scientist, mathematician, etc. But getting to know another side of him through his closest friends and cousins has been unreal. The bitter part is that I'm not able to reflect on it all with him, at least not yet. I wish I could tell him how dope he was and that I get it now. I understand why he thought the way he did, why he taught us the things that he deemed important, like loving everyone, having empathy and letting things go that don't bring positive energy.
My Dad and his sister Avril, both Resting in Paradise
~Twy
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